Monday, May 24, 2010

For years now...

I've been yammering on about how I need to carry a tape recorder around to catch all the weirdo conversations I either overhear, or am directly involved in.
I have no idea how to make that happen of course...what with the tape recorder having gone the way of the phone chord and all.
Here's a few, just off the top of my head, from this past weekend.


Guy inspecting my bike: "So...the exhaust. Baffles yes?"
Me: "Sure."

Yuppie who pulls up to a store entrance in his Highlander, to some hipster kid on a moped, as I am passing between the two of them: "Hey smart guy! You're not the only one who rides a scooter you know! You just passed me on the right! You really should learn how to ride!"
Me, to said yuppie in Highlander: "That's the gayest thing I've ever heard."

Voice from a crowd, to a drunk guy in what can only be described as "Garanimals for Grown Ups" (Picture a Hawaiian shirt, navy blue background & a small,busy, pastel, geometric print, matching shorts and a navy pork pie...Oh! and flip flops)as he is trying to get on a too-tall for him mountain bike: "You're gonna ride a bike?!?!"
Drunk guy, without looking back at the crowd: "Shut up!"


Random attendee at a car show: "Wow!! What year is this bike?!?!"
Me: "1970...mostly."
Random guy: "I almost died on a bike just like this!"
Me: "Hey! Me too!"

Owner of a pretty neat '70 Chevelle: "Why the hell do people keep pointing out the dent in the fender to me? I know its there! I did it. 12 years ago!"
Me: "Awesome."


Natalie said...

I think that too -- like all day I'm walking around saying and witnessing funny/ironic/clever shit. But when I try to relay it to someone else, I always end up getting their furrowed-brow. Inevitably I just back away and mutter..."guess ya had to be there." I sometimes think life would be easier if we all had the same sense of humor...but then I realize we wouldn't have anyone make fun of...

mark phelan said...

i wish i had talked to that guy in the chevelle.